As a new parent and father, I am encouraged by the thought that Joseph Fielding McConkie expressed in a devotional he gave on finding answers. He said,
“The fact that every member of the Church is given the gift of the Holy Ghost is the evidence that the Lord wants to reveal things to you and through you”
I find comfort in that because he not only would have me raise my children in truth and righteousness, he is willing to help me understand his will in meeting the unique needs of each child. I wanted to take a moment and consider some of the dynamics of the role of revelation in parenting. I’ll gather a few thoughts as a starting point for further consideration.
Light and Truth
The Lord instructed the early saints,
“But I have commanded you to bring up your children in light and truth” (D&C 93:40).
One definition of revelation could be just that: light and truth communicated to man by God. So when I start thinking of the question, ‘how do I receive revelation for my children?’ I shouldn’t just limit my thinking to what revelation I need to receive. I can also benefit from years of years of revelation communicated through the scriptures and through living prophets. It becomes incumbent upon us, then, to seek out these words.
“Search the scriptures; for in them ye think ye have eternal life: and they are they which testify of me” (John 5:39).
Brother McConkie in the same address mentioned before articulated a similar idea with these words:
“If angels will not do for you what you can do for yourself, be assured that the Holy Ghost will not do it either.”
I think that’s important for us to understand as parents. Sometimes we feel so helpless in a situation but we haven’t fully sought through the scriptures and the modern-day revelations for understanding the doctrines and principles that we or our children need to understand in a given situation.
Patterns of Revelation
For example, as I considered this question of receiving revelation as a parent I realized that Elder Bendar gave a recent address that is all about revelation in parenting. It is entitled “Watching with All Perseverance” and was given in the April 2010 General Conference. In the address, Elder Bendar identifies practices and patterns we can apply in our family lives that can serve as an early warning indication of troubles and challenges that might face our youth. As I reviewed the talk I realized it’s chalk full of examples of how I as a parent can be a conduit of revelation for my children and in turn these practices help me spiritually discern (revelation) the needs and concerns of my children. Some examples from Elder Bednar:
Being a Means of Revelation to Your Children
Elder Bednar encouraged us to read and talk about the Book of Mormon with our families:
Youth of all ages, even infants, can and do respond to the distinctive spirit of the Book of Mormon. Children may not understand all of the words and stories, but they certainly can feel the “familiar spirit” described by Isaiah (Isaiah 29:4; see also 2 Nephi 26:16)” (Full Address Here).
In Turn, We Receive Revelation
Elder Bednar continues,
And the questions a child asks, the observations a child shares, and the discussions that occur provide crucial spiritual early warning signals. Importantly, such conversations can help parents to discern what their children are learning, thinking, and feeling about the truths contained in this sacred volume of scripture, as well as the difficulties they may be facing.
A similar pattern can be found in the other exhortations that Elder Bednar extends.
Responding to Revelation
One last thought, again from Elder Bednar, but from a different setting. After David A. Bendar was called to the Quorum of the Twelve, he remained for a short period of time as the President of BYU-Idaho. A member of his administration who served as a bishop of a married student ward invited him to speak at a sacrament meeting. In a BYU-Idaho devotional, Garth Hall, the Bishop shared this insight from Elder Bednar.
Elder Bednar taught,
“The World into which you students are going is degenerating so fast that what was required in the past will not be sufficient in the future to provide the necessary spiritual protection. The rapidity with which we respond to prophetic counsel will be an important source of protection.” Quoted by Garth V. Hall, “To Prepare Their Hearts and Be Prepared in All Things”, BYU-Idaho Devotional.
With so much ancient and modern-revelation at our disposal, the degree in which we engage with the revelation and how quickly we respond can further protect our families as we seek for the Celestial Kingdom of God. I know that the promises of the scriptures are true that if we seek we shall find and if we knock it shall be opened unto us. It’s my faith that this is especially true about our family, the most important social unit on earth and in eternity.